Jokes

It’s that time. Because I say so.

How do you put an elephant inside a fridge?
I don’t know.
It’s easy, you just open the fridge and put it in.

How do you put a donkey inside the fridge?
It’s easy, you just open the fridge and put it in.
No, you open the fridge, take out the elephant, then put the donkey in.

If all the animals went to the lion’s birthday party, and one animal went missing which one would it be?
The lion, of course, because it would eat all the animals.
No, it’s the donkey because it’s still inside the fridge.

If there’s a river full of crocodiles, and you wanted to cross, how would you?
I would need a boat to cross.
No, you just swim across because all the animals went to the lion’s birthday party.

 

Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work?
A: A stick.

 

A blind man enters a bar and find his way to a barstool.
After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind guy yells to the bartender, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”
The bar immediately becomes absolutely quiet.
In a husky, deep voice, the woman next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde and I’m a 6′ tall, 200 pound blonde with a black belt in karate. What’s more, the fella sitting next to me is blonde and he’s a weightlifter. The woman to your right is a blonde, and she’s a pro wrestler. Think about it seriously, mister. You still wanna tell that blonde joke?”
The blind guy says, “Nah, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times.”

 

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

 

My cow gives less milk,
now that it has been eaten,
by a fierce dragon.

Five syllables here.
Seven more syllables here.
Are you happy now?

And finally,

Haikus are easy.
But sometimes they don’t make sense.
Refrigerator.

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